Sometimes the perfect word of encouragement really happens.
We’ve been talking about how rare the perfect word of encouragement is, how we shouldn’t wait to get everything perfect to encourage someone, how words alone often fail completely. But there are times, a few brief shining times, when the exact word of encouragement at the exact right time finally does happen.
It’s a beautiful thing.
If we could understand that process then we could get there faster. We could get there more often. We could make more of a difference. How would that work?
Option One: Be Perfect
If I knew everything, was a perfect listener, was a trained counselor, was a brilliant communicator and had amazing timing then it would be easy to find the perfect word to encourage someone.
Thank goodness this isn’t necessary. Many people have been encouraged by that perfect word from someone as imperfect as you or I. But we didn’t invent a brilliant phrase to change someone’s life. If we could do that, we would change our own lives.
Option Two: How It Really Works
Okay, perfect isn’t an option. So how does it happen? How do imperfect people find the perfect word?
We don’t.
I’m not saying that people’s lives aren’t changed by a few words. It happens. I’m not saying to give up on encouragement. In fact, I’m saying the opposite. We should encourage others as much as we can. It’s essential.
I’m just saying there is no perfect word, no turn of phrase that you can think up to change someone’s life. And if you pursue perfection you will miss what encouragement is all about. You see, it’s not about what you say.
It’s About What They Hear
Have you ever been listening to someone talk and they say something that inspires another idea in your head? You might nod along with them but you are so taken by this idea that you really aren’t listening anymore. You snap out of it and realize they are still talking away and you haven’t heard a word.
But there’s this wonderful idea.
Where did it come from? Is the person standing in front of you a genius? Did they really know exactly what to say to change everything? How could they know the exact word at exactly the right time?
They didn’t.
It’s too complicated an equation.
They didn’t tap into the cosmos, zoom in on your unknown situation, understand it and comprehend the perfect solution, calculate the exact moment you needed to hear it, drive across town, make it appear like an accidental meeting and BOOM, lay it on you.
They were just talking.
Think about it. These super-encouragers leave their car keys in the refrigerator. They leave the iron on when they go to work. They run red lights. They can’t balance their checkbooks and text at the same time. These people are just like us. They don’t have superpowers or supernatural knowledge about your situation.
They may not have even said what you think they said.
You Told Me . . .
More than once in my life, I’ve had people give me credit for saying something that I didn’t actually say. It meant a lot to them. They talk about what a difference it made.
But I don’t remember it at all. Or I remember it the way I really said it.
I don’t correct them. I don’t take credit for it either. I realize I was standing in front of them when they had a great idea, when something connected, when it all suddenly made sense.
Jesus said it like this:
Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit. (Mark 13:11 NIV)
God can inspire you to say what you need to say OR hear what you need to hear, just when you need to hear it.
That’s the perfect word.
The Missing Verse
Perhaps you’ve been reading your Bible and suddenly seen a verse that wasn’t there before. You’ve read the section over and over but this simply wasn’t there – at least not as far as you can recall.
But there it is, big as life, and it’s the perfect thing you needed to hear.
Again, that’s the perfect word.
The Perfect Coincidence
Have you ever learned something brand new and exciting, something that changed your life, and the next thing you know someone asks you about it? They just happen to need the exact thing you’ve learned and you are surprised to have the answer.
It’s almost like you planned it, but you didn’t. It’s a random chance.
Or was it? You’re catching on.
The perfect word can only be said by someone perfect.
It’s God Whispering
Why does God whisper? Because when He talks out loud we run away. (Exodus 20:18 & 19) Or when he sends angels it scares people to death! They have to spend the next twenty minutes saying “Fear Not” and calming things down.
So God encourages us through people He inspires. And sometimes He helps us hear what wasn’t said at all. Or He highlights a passage of scripture in our mind’s eye and enlightens us.
That’s why God sent Jesus in human form. That’s why Jesus had this discussion with His disciples:
He said to them, This is what I told you while I was still with you: Everything must be fulfilled that is written about me in the Law of Moses, the Prophets and the Psalms. Then he opened their minds so they could understand the Scriptures. He told them, This is what is written: The Messiah will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance for the forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. You are witnesses of these things. I am going to send you what my Father has promised; but stay in the city until you have been clothed with power from on high. (Luke 24: 44-49 NIV)
He opened their minds!
I think that exclamation point is deserved. The disciples had read these scriptures but didn’t understand them until Jesus made them clear. The perfect word was written long before but it took an epiphany to comprehend that they were written about Jesus, the man they had been following for years.
This is how God, who is perfect, sends us the perfect word of encouragement through imperfect people.
People get to participate, they get to stand there, but the real encouragement comes from the source of all encouragement, the Great Encourager, the Author of Hope – God.
He just doesn’t demand the credit. He doesn’t need it.
The Pressure Is Off
We don’t have to be perfect, or think up some magic phrase. God doesn’t require us. He lets us join in His encouragement. He lets us say His words and give His hugs. It helps us understand.
And He knows we need the practice.
Part OnePart Two Photo by Incase via Flickr
